I know what it’s like to be attacked from the inside by darkness that is all-consuming and painful. I know what it’s like to feel dead, to not really know why life should continue. I know how tiring it is to have your heart trampled on again, and again, and again, and then stepped on and kicked.
Why not just call it quits? Because I believe in a higher power which I call God/ universe/ Creator. This is also the reason why I understand and see things from a different perspective. I know that death, as painful as it may seem to some, and as definite as it may appear, is merely an illusion. We don’t ever die, we just leave the shell called the human body and enter into a different state of being.
Even if I were to kill myself I know that that wouldn’t solve anything, if anything it would make things worse, yes-worse. As crazy as that sounds it’s true, it goes back to the evolution of the soul, we take our energy/karma with us so whatever it is we are trying to run away from will follow us. The worst part is that it can take many years before we get to reincarnate into a human body again and try to liberate ourselves from the cycle of birth and death.
We have nowhere to go, we can’t run from the pain, the only place to go is inside. As painful as it may be it’s the only way out, we must face our pain in order to be free from it. Life is designed to humble us, to break our hearts open so that we may surrender to our higher power and be liberated. Within the vessel of our being lay all the answers, but first, we must be willing to get out of the way to let the light shine. Therein is our paradise, the eternal paradise, freedom, true freedom.