As a sensitive person I feel things deeply, thus if I get hurt I suffer a great deal. I’ve experienced a lot of trauma in life, but for many reasons, I’ve chosen not to numb the pain nor take any kind of pharmaceutical medication to alleviate the suffering. This is why I’ve looked to spirituality to help me not only heal but also understand the reason behind the pain, the reasons why such experiences were necessary, basically, to answer all of the, ‘why’s,’ that a naturally curious person has. Some answers come quickly, others take time before they arrive or I’m able to assimilate the experience and understand.
I’ve been blessed to be able to continue on this path and find many methods to heal, to do, ‘the work,’ and face my shadows, to be humbled and see that often it was I who created some of the pain because of old conditioning that I learned in order to survive a troubled past. I’ve also been blessed with the presence of others who have crossed my path and helped me see what I could not see; heal what I myself could not heal.
This path has not been easy, not at all, toward the end of last year it became more challenging as I was being prepared for this year. I became more sensitive, as if I wasn’t already sensitive enough. There were moments where I wanted to tear my heart out in pain, but the strength and resilience that I built as a child helped me get through it, along with some very dear souls. So why continue on this journey? Love and loyalty, love of a creator many call by many names, loyalty to a mission which I set on long before my memory.
There is a balance, not all days are dark, I’ve seen many rainbows after the storms, and experienced things people won’t believe nor fathom the idea of even being possible. But my faith has allowed me these experiences, things which many are blind to because they remain caught in the temporary illusions of life.
My path is my path, though I often get misunderstood and judged by my choices, I am at peace because I have made decisions out of my free will and not because of what someone said I should or shouldn’t do. Naturally, this causes some people discomfort because it challenges their ideas of wrong or right. At the end of the day I know who I have to respond to, I am aware of the laws and I am at peace with my life no matter how crazy it can be at times. This is my path and I am responsible for it, no one else, I walk knowing who I have in my presence and that is all that matters.
As one of my friends says, I invite you to commit to this journey, the path of the higher self, and see for yourself what it has to offer. Perhaps you are tired of the material world and it has you worn out and confused. This is the perfect time to invest in yourself, your higher self, the you that is hidden behind the veil of ignorance, the you that is perfect and remains untouchable. You hold the key, no one else. Namaste.